Defining ourselves

Okay, here’s one for the younger set of folks, those in their teens and early adulthood. For others who area already in their mid-life, perhaps it’ll be more of a reminiscence of youth. Either way, I’m surprised how life continues pretty much unchanged even as we head towards the end of the first decade n the 21st century and technological advances is breaching new grounds each day.

This has to do very much with self-worth, and of course the influence of TV, movies, pop cultures and such – all that determines one’s social life.

What I’m talking about is the “need” that one has to carve out an image for himself/herself, many of whom would go to great lengths to do so. This image that one takes on is meant to define how that person “is”. And that image is often than not, taken from characters played by actors throughout silverscreens and TV.

The “bad boy” image, the “troubled suicidal youth” image, the “dumb blond” image or the “rebel rouser”… yes, we all recognize these images whom we try to define ourselves in. And the fear of not having such character images for ourselves can be quite scary, one that might leave us as society outcasts. Or scarier still, as conformists. For many, it is a way to encapsulate ourselves into a shell and harden our defenses to face the challenges of life such as broken families, hopeless futures and meaningless lives.

But underneath all that, whether it is a need to conform or challenge society’s norms, lies an even greater need of the individual that cannot be addressed by merely taking on such screen characters for oneself. That is, to be able to define ourselves by our own character and our own rules… what many would describe as “coming into one’s own”.

Granted, it isn’t likely that one can do and realize that without having to go through a fair bit of life’s hills and valleys. But it truly is sad to have to see our youths all too ready to take their own lives with suicidal pacts and reckless living. George Bernard Shaw’s words best describe it – “Youth is wasted on the young”.

Now, if only our youths can “come into their own” at a younger age. If only they can try instead to define themselves by their own rules and standards and not have the need to “prove” to others. If only… ah, then we’ll have more middle age folks around, wouldn’t we? (Err.., that’s both in chronological and mental age, I mean!)